Thursday, March 15, 2018

Gratitude: My Current Feelings Towards Blogging



I decided to not link the outfit in this particular post as to not stray away from why I posted this. If you do want the details I have this look on the like to know it app (follow me HERE)! Thank you! 



I felt so compelled to come on and write tonight and I knew that in my heart God was telling me to share this moment and these feelings with all of you. A couple of months ago little ole me applied for media passes to New Orleans Fashion Week. I did not think much of it after I applied. I did not figure I would get them, but I figured that it was worth a shot. Well today I had dinner with my family and was just checking my email and that's when I saw the email. Now, before we talk about that moment let me preface this with when I applied it said that if you were to receive media passes you would know by March 1st. Well for the last two weeks I've been checking my email like crazy and getting upset because I did not recieve the email I was dying to see. That was until tonight, I opened my email to see "Congratulations! Here are your media passes to fashion week!" When I tell y'all I screamed, I screamed. I know what you're probably thinking "What's so important about a media pass?" Well, a lot. This is a door opening for me.

Lately, I have been feeling super discouraged about blogging. I put in so much time and effort for my Instagram numbers not to reflect on how hard I work. I've been doing this for almost a year and I'm here while someone who just started has already hit ten thousand followers. Usually I don't let those things get to me, it's all a part of the business. But lately I have felt like it has been eating away at me.

Let me be completely raw with you guys for a second, I don't have the relationship with God that I want to have. I have always thought that going to church all the time would bring me closer to God. When I would start consistently going to church I would begin to feel closer to him but not like I wanted to. It is in this moment right now that I can truly feel God in my life working. It is in this blog post that I can feel his words flowing through me. These words are not mine but simply his flowing through me onto you. I have never felt something as powerful and amazing as this feels. And to be honest with you guys it is due to two fellow amazing bloggers, Brighton Keller and Peyton Baxter. They are so open and raw about their faith through their platform and it has got me thinking so much lately. Everything they were saying was driving my mind so fast. And let me tell you why.

Come back to tonight when I read the email, it felt like a huge door just opened for me. Being invited to attend fashion week is a huge deal for me and my career as a blogger. I have been feeling so discouraged and to open that email and see it was insane to me. I never imagined to ever open my email and see that. But lately I've been just been giving it to God, because he was constantly telling me not to give up that my time was coming. But it was hard to believe him but wow I should have. Y'all I can't explain it but this was all God, he opened this up for me. This is a huge door opening for me that could bring me to so many opportunities and it's all because of him.

As crazy as this sounds this almost felt like an epiphany for me. Never have I felt God flow through me before the way that he has tonight. God is inviting me into having a better relationship with him. He's calling me and I have never felt this before. But I am not only thankful to God but to you guys as well. Without you guys none of this would be possible for me. I cannot believe the opportunities that I have had thus far. I appreciate all of you guys more than you will ever understand. You guys changed my life in a way that I didn't know blogging could do for me. Thank you for everything you guys have done for me in this.

Also a huge thank you to my boyfriend and photographer. He has dealt with the crazy photo shoots in the freezing cold and the sweltering heat and didn't complain one bit. He has dealt with the late night editing on the one night of the week that we are together and he never complains. He has stepped up into a role that he didn't sign up for and I love him so much for it. There's no man that could ever compare to the man that Trevor is to me. He melts my heart everyday with his outpouring of love and support for me and my dreams.

Also, another big thank you to my parents cause none of this would be possible without them. They have done so much since I have started this and I am beyond appreciative for it. I hope to be half as good of a parent as they are to me to my children one day. That outpouring love for me in all of this is amazing and I couldn't do it without them.

I know it's crazy that all of this came out just because of some passes to fashion week but it is so much more to me than that. Seriously, thank you all for everything. I love all of you and I love connecting with you guys on a daily basis. Thank you for everything!

Much  love, Zoe Taylor

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